A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

What is in the center of our galaxy? Some stars, space, and nebula.

Boys have swag, real men have class

Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

What is the difference between a black man and a burnt pizza? -Nothing there both black.

A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Im cute hehehee

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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