Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

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you just read an anti-joke

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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