what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because I took a swing at it with a golf club.

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What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

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why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

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j

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What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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