I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

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What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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69

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Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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karn chevalier

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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