Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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how many people does it take to take over the world aperently just 1 me

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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24

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

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What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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