How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

Black People

What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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