What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

The WNBA.

Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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