What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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A duck walks in wal-mart and buys stuff. The cashier ask how hes going to pay and the duck said just put it on my bill.

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Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

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Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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batman has diarrhea

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

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woman's rights

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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