why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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just imagine like a whole mark no imagine like 1000 marks an army of marks ready to conquer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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why does the guy jack off to black on black porn? because he's black

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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The WNBA

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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If you have me you want to share me, if you share me you no longer have me. What am I? (a secrect)

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Women's Rights.

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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