What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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