I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

Q: What are 4 consecutive fart's called? A: Fart's, unless someone gives them names?

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

Equal rights!

A man walks into a bar

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Whats the answer to life? im not sure

A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

What do fruits and computers have in common. Microsoft.

I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

Reverse psychology never fails.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

Q. Why did the black man not get on the boat A. Because he gets seasick

A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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