What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

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Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

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There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Why did the chicken cross the buffet table? To get to the other sides.

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NEVER

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How do you get a blonde out of a tree? Shoot her in the head.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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(Insert joke here)

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops