What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

Why was the woman sad? Because her son died.

I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

when life throws you lemons you should watch out or you might get hurt.

What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

MAKE

Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? A puppy, but it was left too long in a wrapped up box without air, it quickly suffocated and ruined the kids chirstmas.

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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