why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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