Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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Why are white people white? I don't know

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Two friends go on a hunting trip together. One friend says to the other "Knock, knock." The other friend doesn't respond because he was mauled by a bear.

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

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What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

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What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops