Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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women's rights

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

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What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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