A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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why was the little girl crying? because i raped her.

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What is the diffrence between a jew and a mexican One is a religous practice and the other is a racial diversity

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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