Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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69

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

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what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

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Due to the wildlife conservation program prevalent in the neighborhood, the chicken was able to cross the road safely.

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops