How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

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What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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