Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

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What's worse than getting a flat tire on a date? getting one while rushing your dying grandfather to the hospital.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack, due to her poor eating habits.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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what do you call a man who likes other men? A fag

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What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

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Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

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Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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save me from the nothing ive become

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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Q. what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A. nothing you done told her twice already

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops