Knock knock -Who's there? Orange -I don't get it.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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two ducks run into each other........ then they walk away

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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What's the difference between a soldier and a black man? A black man lives a normal life, probably working a full time job to bring income to his family. A soldier has seen his friends killed right before his very eyes, has probably killed, and most likely has night terrors accompanied by the sounds of gunshots and grenades. He will suffer trauma up until he dies of a heart attack in his mid 80's after experiencing a terrifying flashback of life in the war.

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Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops