What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

fun fact for the day: 100% of people that drink water die sooner or later

Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

Chuck Norris can carry very heavy objects.

What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

What is worse than 3 lesbians in a telephone booth? 6 squirrels donkey punching your urethra.

A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

A Hispanic, Jew and black man walk into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because he's closed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...