How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

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Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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women's rights

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

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A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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Yo mama is so fat... she died due to type two diabetes.

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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Smeg...

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what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babys taking them out with a pitchfork

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

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What's yellow and shouldnt be in this country. The asian girl in my economics class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops