There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

Joesph Triphook.

You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

Knock Knock The doors already open

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

Why was the man sad? His wife left

"Knock knock." "Come in."

What did the old man say? Im old

whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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