Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

This is my favorite antijoke.

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

Why do they call it "Unsweetened Tea?" Did they put sugar in it and then take it back out again?

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

the story below is a truee story...unfortunately!!!!!!!!! :'(

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

I woke up today

Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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