What did the african get for his birthday? an ounce of water, as water is very scares in his community and it is a great resource

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Agent 47.

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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