Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

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two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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What is the good thing about having sex with KL..... Nothing because she is a fat man

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

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why was the little boy crying? he wasnt, he died 2 weeks ago

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

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What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

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The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What is my favorite color? How the heck should I know?

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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