- Anti Joke

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

Why did the dog die? He was old

Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

How do you cheer up a sad caterpillar? KILL IT WITH FIRE

Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

How do you make the general public confused? ...

Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

A baby seal walks into a club.

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.