David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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There is something fishy about.... the fish curry at home

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What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the seat next to you? A: Whatever his name happens to be.

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Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

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Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

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why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

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So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

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What do you get when you mix C4 with a lit- KABOOM!!!

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Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

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Get some flipping new jokes people

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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What did the Japanese man name his black baby? -Som Ting Wong :)

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what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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Q: Why did the man get stabbed? A: I don't know.

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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why did the kid stop eating his breakfast...two Penn state officials knocked at the door

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Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops