A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? It doesn't really matter but I wouldn't actually call anything because they have very sensitive hearing and will probably panic and, being blind, might collide with a tree.

Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

What did the guy say to the campgrounds? It was in tents (get it like intense but it is a pun)

Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

What did the white guy say to the two black guys? I like oreos.

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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