You sick fiend

"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

i named my son Frodo because he was little

What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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