Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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How do you get a Blonde to brake her nosebone? You put your dick under a glastable! QQ

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

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When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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A blonde walks into a bar; she orders and enjoys her drink and then leaves with her thirst quenched.

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

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what's worse than a joke about the holocaust? the holocaust.

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Roses are yellow Daisies are purple Tv drinks yes Why swing the door

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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q ggggggggggggggggg

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How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

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Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops