When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

You suck big fat slobber

What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

Flowers are colors Love me

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

I'd like to make a withdraw

what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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