Why did the man get a tattoo? A: he wanted to express himself.

Why did the teenager commit suicide? Because he was constantly being bullied in school, which caused him to be depressed. Days later he found out that his mother had breast cancer and was most likely not going to survive.

Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

Chris Bosh's neck

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

these are shit

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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