Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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what is not funny? This joke.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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