two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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69.9

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A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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who farted i did :]

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Women's Rights

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops