What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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Jesus wept.

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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