Pianos.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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GOODBYE

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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a black man and a white man walk into a job interview. neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Caca.

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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