- Anti Joke

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies