What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

my whole life!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

thumb_up thumb_down +10

PIED NINNY!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops