What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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What's good? Anything that is not bad.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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69

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Why wasn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She didnt get her driver license...

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, I like Tities and so do you

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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ded on boomer and aodddan

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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Does anyone know any good ways to piss off an Grammar Nazi?

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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