Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

these are shit

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

Your momma's so dumb, she has below average IQ.

Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

What happened to the blind boy? He went deaf.. helen kellered....

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

People spending hours typing nothing but cus words? Who does that?

What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...