A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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Finding TWO worms in your apple.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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why did the dog eat its breakfast of meat because he was hungry

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

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you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

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Woman's Rights

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops