What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

knock knock who's there? hope

What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

What did little Timmy get for Christmas? Abandoned

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

A kid a jew and a child molester walk into a room . what happens next? Nothing there in a room.

what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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