Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

general tso's broccoli

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

Legal Mexicans in Texas

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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