What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Robin, get in the car!

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hi

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

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why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

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what's black? a lot of things.

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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A white man, a black man, a Mexican man and a Chinese man were on the same bus. The didn't socialize cuz that would count as racism

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One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

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Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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