Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

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hi anti joke

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

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what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

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Here's a joke for you, my life...

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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A mentally disabled person asked a tree, "Are you a tree?" the tree didn't say anything because it can not speak.

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A man walks into a Bar, and he gets kicked out because its an animal only bar no people allowed

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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