why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Why am I sad right now? Because I just Sh*t my pants.

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Knock knock. With the invention of doorbells, knocking has become almost obsolete.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Why did Rosie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus...

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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