42

What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

Why did the black man kill his girlfriend? Because it was his mom!

I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

How many orangoutangs does it take to screw in a light bulb? 16; mongoloid

Dog walks into a bar Asked for a hard cider Got it

2

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

Saggy Nipples By chan chan

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With floss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...