What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

01101110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01100101 01101100 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 translate here http://binarytranslator.com/

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

I can vote and I am equal to males in the work enviornment. That's what she said.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

what is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babes. when i saw the Porsche i told the guy nice car and he was like yea whatever then i went and killed 50 babes and lost conciseness when i woke up i saw the Porsche again and thought what a nice car and when i saw the babes i thought what kind of monster killed all those babes

What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

I love it when i go into my classroom first thing in the morning, and the light are off... i always feel so Empowered... i walk in, and say Let There Be Light! while i lift my arms up and there was light.... omg! im god! O_O

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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