Whats black, white, and red all over? a dead panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

hey justin

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Smeg...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is the blonde so upset? Her mother is dying from cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops