What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

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What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

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whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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